Not the first granddaughter

Well bug held the prize for a while, but Monday morning at 8:26 am my brother and his wife welcomed a beautiful baby girl to the family! Miss Sydney Rose was 8 lbs 10 oz and 21.5 inches long! She is so precious.

My family all got the call to stand by the phones on Sunday as my SIL was headed to hospital. Since I had been up since 1:30 that morning I told my mom that I was going to try to nap in case I had to drive down later that night.....then the text messages start, phone keeps ringing. I'm sorry but what part of I'm going to try to nap did you all not understand! But she was sent home, poor thing!

Monday morning I was up at 12:30 with some serious BH and was able to get back to sleep around 1:30 only to be woken up at 2:00 with the call to get to the hospital. I just laid there wanting to cry because I was so overly tired and the thought of driving to Worcester at that time just didn't sit well with me. I woke up hubs and told him I had to leave. He wanted no part of me being in a car, at that time of night, on minimal sleep, being 9 months preggo. Thankfully my sister met me off the highway on her way down and we followed each other and talked on the phones the whole way to keep each other awake. Made it to the hospital just before 4:00 and they were giving her fluids before she could get epidural - this made me happy since she felt so strongly about going o'natural! ;) Love how she was trying but lasted a hot minute before she was asking for the drugs!

My brother sent a text saying they were prepping the room for her to start to push right before 8:00 - this is when we all started to bet to see how long it would be. By 9:30 we got another text asking how the anticipation was in the waiting room....ugh you little shit bag! By 9:50 he was standing in the doorway announcing the birth of his baby girl! Mom only pushed for about 30 minutes! How sweet is that!

Sydney checking out her new 'favorite' aunt (kept telling her that so she'll have to believe it)

Amelia and Sydney meeting each other

What made me giggle was every time I held her my bug kept kicking - so either she was saying hello or she was saying get away from my mommy! 

Being there made me so excited to get to meet our little girl. I can't believe it's right around the corner!

Laboring cream cheese????

WTF? I thought I heard it all until yesterday. My SIL is now officially past her due date and is showing no signs of this baby coming any time soon. My mother was keeping the family updated and then sent out one of her confusing emails that takes 5 people to try to translate about going to Worcester to get the baby cream cheese. WHAT????????? There is a place in Worcester MA that sells cream cheese that is supposed to cause labor.
STILL don't believe me....here's the link: http://ericslapatisserie.com/radio.html

Not sure if they went and got it for her but I can honestly say I think I have heard it all now! Cream cheese...really????????

Tomorrow is our 36 week appointment and bugs last photo shoot. Dreading stepping on the scale and seeing how much more weight I've gained the past 2 weeks! I know, I know, I'm pregnant and supposed to be putting on weight but it's hard for me. I've never been 'heavy'...well minus college when I was chunka face from the mass amounts of beer I consumed ;) but honestly I have never gone over 140/145 (I'm 5'9"). I struggled with an eating disorder back when I was 19 - had to make sure that I had no time to eat, which was easy since it was the summer. This was my day, every day: got up, went to work, after work went to work out, went tanning (yes in the summer), went to high school track to do sprints, got home, showered, went out for the night. Thankfully it didn't last long and I smartened up! Jump ahead 5 or so years I start to date my ex - who was 6'2" 220 lbs of solid muscle. At that time he owned a health food store so of course he's going to be in perfect shape. I begin to work out with him and get back into my old habits....then stop. I know it's not a pretty road so I alter my eating habits and just eat clean. I had gotten down to about 115 lbs during the time we were together (4 years) granted I thought I looked great because I was lean and had defined muscles that I never knew existed. Looking back after we broke up I knew I was too skinny and it wasn't healthy! Oh and I forgot to mention Mr. Health Nut who wouldn't allow milk in the house because it had fat in it was on the juice! Yeah that's good for business!

That brings me to today and me having distorted body image issues. For example: Kate....how on EARTH was she carrying an 8lb baby looking the way she did...amazing! Then seeing her the day after she just gave birth...come on! Part of me thought for a second there is no way she was really pregnant/gave birth - no one ever looks that good! See...I have issues! HA HA

I am not starving myself or my child....TRUST me, no worries there. Just having a very difficult time with the way I look.....in the end is it worth it, absolutely....will I be back to working out as soon as the doc gives me the okay, you can bet your ass I will be ;)

Well that stung a little.....

No, I'm not referring to a bee sting. I'm referring to finding out that one of my best friends is 16 weeks pregnant and has kept it from us for a few reasons: 1 - she wanted to surprise us when she came out at the end of August and 2 - she didn't want to be considered and insenstive asshole and take away from my pregnancy. Now, as much as I appreciate her thinking about my feelings I told her that I was a little mad she hasn't said anything. As happy as I am for her and her husband, it did sting a bit when she told me. I mean her daughter isn't even a year old yet! She kept on telling me she didn't want to tell me because of how hard it was for hubs and I and didn't want to upset me. Listen, I'm not a China Doll - if I haven't broken already with everything that has happened over the past, shit, almost 4 years now, I think I'm good. Will I have days where I ask why, sure will. Will I have days that I ask what did I do, absolutley - but I will not break. I will have my 'moment' and move on.

When hubs called on his way home from work I had to tell him - he was just as shocked as I was. When I told him that it did sting a bit he asked me why and then quickly figured it out and said it does suck that some people can get pregnant easily but we got this, we know what the problem is and we will keep moving forward.

It's hard for me to not be envious/jealous of the fertiles - even if I am pregnant - I have so many people that I have met that struggle daily that I just wish they can get their dreams handed to them.....to start their very own family! 

Spoiled rotten already

This little girl of mine is already spoiled rotten. I had my shower this past Saturday and as I was dreading the days leading up to it, dreading the time before the guests showed up, it turned out to be such an amazing day. I was trapped upstairs as my mom wanted the decorations to be a surprise....not that I don't have windows upstairs that I could peek out of....I only cheated a few times ;)
My family went over and beyond what anyone could have asked for....was hoping my mother would have uploaded her pics so I could share in her details/decorations but she hasn't gotten there yet.
The day weather wise was great - got a little hot once the clouds broke but couldn't have asked for a nicer day. When hubs got home from work he went inside and saw all the stuff in the dining room and then the office - looked at me and goes, 'Holy Shit! Where is all this stuff going?' I started to laugh. Yesterday I was determined to get everything organized and cleaned up a bit. Did pretty well I think and will begin to wash the ridiculous amounts of clothes she has tonight.
Probably one, well yes one of the best gifts....a giant basket FILLED with clothes and a pair of sneakers attached to handle all from my dad. My mom had been telling me that when they go shopping he walks away and comes back with his own bags of stuff for Amelia....it was cute that he did that.
My second favorite gift: was a doll house from my middle sister. When we were growing up my two older sisters got custom wooden doll houses (you know the fancy pants ones that you can paint/has electricity/etc) well I never got one for whatever reason...not that I'm holding a grudge still ;) Her card was what sent me over the edge. Started off my saying that Amelia will be the closest thing to a daughter she will have and wanted to pass down the doll house. She is the one that was always known as the 'strong' sister but in her card she told me that she couldn't have been more proud of my strength and determination through everything the past few years and that I was so much stronger than her.
As everyone was getting ready to leave, I hugged my mom so tight and couldn't thank her enough for everything she did for me that day. She held my face and said no, thank you for jumping in feet first and never giving up hope to let us have this day.