No, I'm not referring to a bee sting. I'm referring to finding out that one of my best friends is 16 weeks pregnant and has kept it from us for a few reasons: 1 - she wanted to surprise us when she came out at the end of August and 2 - she didn't want to be considered and insenstive asshole and take away from my pregnancy. Now, as much as I appreciate her thinking about my feelings I told her that I was a little mad she hasn't said anything. As happy as I am for her and her husband, it did sting a bit when she told me. I mean her daughter isn't even a year old yet! She kept on telling me she didn't want to tell me because of how hard it was for hubs and I and didn't want to upset me. Listen, I'm not a China Doll - if I haven't broken already with everything that has happened over the past, shit, almost 4 years now, I think I'm good. Will I have days where I ask why, sure will. Will I have days that I ask what did I do, absolutley - but I will not break. I will have my 'moment' and move on.
When hubs called on his way home from work I had to tell him - he was just as shocked as I was. When I told him that it did sting a bit he asked me why and then quickly figured it out and said it does suck that some people can get pregnant easily but we got this, we know what the problem is and we will keep moving forward.
It's hard for me to not be envious/jealous of the fertiles - even if I am pregnant - I have so many people that I have met that struggle daily that I just wish they can get their dreams handed to them.....to start their very own family!
No comments:
Post a Comment